If you have a friend or loved one who is an alcoholic, then chances are good that you have been lied to a lot. And you are probably getting pretty sick of it. But although it may feel like you are the only one who is going through this, you aren’t alone. Unfortunately, addiction and lying go hand in hand for the following reasons:
Alcoholics don’t just lie to other people. They also lie to themselves. The reason why do addicts lie is that it makes it easier for them to continue to keep drinking. If they were to stop to see the truth about the harm that they are doing to themselves and those who care about them, it would cause them a great deal of guilt and inner turmoil that they don’t want to deal with.
One of the most common ways that people try to help alcoholics is by confronting them about their drinking problem. But instead of having a peaceful conversation regarding the situation, this usually involves an angry screaming match after the alcoholic stumbles home drunk yet again. With emotions running high, little is ever accomplished during the arguments, especially if the alcoholic doesn’t really want to change. So another of the reasons why do alcoholics lie is to avoid uncomfortable situations like this by simply telling people whatever they think that they want to hear. For example, if the alcoholic is asked if they went to the bar, they may lie and say that they worked late instead. That way, they appear to be functioning at a better level than usual that will make people stop asking them questions.
Those who have never struggled with why do addicts lie often don’t realize that alcoholics and lying also occurs not just whenever they are addicted to lying, but because they are in a great deal of pain that keeps them trapped in a cycle. They know that their life is spinning out of control because of their drinking, but every time that they don’t have a beer or a glass of wine, they become overwhelmed with uncomfortable emotions.
Often, an alcoholic is lying because they have a poor sense of self-esteem. Their situation is embarrassing to them, and they don’t want anyone to know about it. So they start making up stories that make them seem more “normal” to other people. This addiction and lying behavior is often further encouraged if those who they lie to act in a more positive manner to the person addicted to lying than they do whenever they hear the truth.
After spending enough time with them, it becomes easier how to tell when an alcoholic is lying because they tend to have a pattern of behavior that can be followed. For example, each time that they want to go to the bar, they may say that they are headed to a certain friend’s house. Facial cues also give hints to the alcoholics and lying, especially the eyes. When a person lies, they may struggle to maintain eye contact by looking around the room. Or they might look directly at someone, but their eyes shift up and to the left. The smell of alcohol coming from their breath will be very noticeable too.
After reading this, you might be feeling a lot of mixed emotions, especially if you have been dealing with why do alcoholics lie for a long time. But it is important to remember that the only way to stop the cycle of addiction is to get your friend or loved one into a treatment facility where they can begin the recovery process. So don’t wait. Call today to talk to one of our specialists about how to take the first step.